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- Livy Clemens
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It isn’t any use, Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens) begins: Madame Blanc has got herself into a snit and there is nothing he can do about it. He did not mean to offend her; it is her French obtusenesses, and not he, which is to blame. In fact, she owes herself an apology...
If she had been properly constructed she would not have perceived any offense: I didn't construct her, & am not responsible for her defects. Whenever I try to lie in earnest I fail to deceive. If I should try to make her believe I am distressed because I have offended her, I shouldn't "arrive." I have committed no offense, either by fact, act or intention, & so I know I couldn't successfully pretend to be sorry - for a thing which hasn't occurred. You see, the whole trouble lies in the French character. It hasn't a shed of humor in it, consequently there is no depth to it: its compass, regulator, balance-wheel, is lacking. When you have hurt a Frenchman, you have hurt a child: you can't reason with him, you can only kiss him & pet him & flatter him. If I come across Mme. B I mean to tell her I was not intending to hurt her. I don't imagine it will do any good: but I couldn't say any more & make it sound sincere.
Added is that he that he leaves for Paris soon to join the family in going to Aix-les-Bains for Livy’s gout; Susy is getting stronger and healthier; and he hopes they all might again soon get together.
If she had been properly constructed she would not have perceived any offense: I didn't construct her, & am not responsible for her defects. Whenever I try to lie in earnest I fail to deceive. If I should try to make her believe I am distressed because I have offended her, I shouldn't "arrive." I have committed no offense, either by fact, act or intention, & so I know I couldn't successfully pretend to be sorry - for a thing which hasn't occurred. You see, the whole trouble lies in the French character. It hasn't a shed of humor in it, consequently there is no depth to it: its compass, regulator, balance-wheel, is lacking. When you have hurt a Frenchman, you have hurt a child: you can't reason with him, you can only kiss him & pet him & flatter him. If I come across Mme. B I mean to tell her I was not intending to hurt her. I don't imagine it will do any good: but I couldn't say any more & make it sound sincere.
Added is that he that he leaves for Paris soon to join the family in going to Aix-les-Bains for Livy’s gout; Susy is getting stronger and healthier; and he hopes they all might again soon get together.
Autograph Letter Signed ("S.L. Clemens"), 4 pages, octavo, The Players, 16 Gramercy Park (N.Y., N.Y.), April 30, 1894. To Grace E. King.
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Page 1/4
THE PLAYERS,
16 GRAMERCY PARK.
April 30/94.
Dear Miss Grace :
Oh, it isn't a bit of use. I have not offended ; it is Mme B.'s [text is crossed out] ^French obtuseness which is to blame. She owes herself an apology; I owe her none. If she had been properly constructed she would ^not have perceived any offense : I didn't construct her, & am not responsible for her defects. Whenever I try to lie in earnest I fail to deceive. If I should try to make her believe I ^am distressed because ^I have [text is crossed out] offended her, [text is crossed out] I shouldn't
16 GRAMERCY PARK.
April 30/94.
Dear Miss Grace :
Oh, it isn't a bit of use. I have not offended ; it is Mme B.'s [text is crossed out] ^French obtuseness which is to blame. She owes herself an apology; I owe her none. If she had been properly constructed she would ^not have perceived any offense : I didn't construct her, & am not responsible for her defects. Whenever I try to lie in earnest I fail to deceive. If I should try to make her believe I ^am distressed because ^I have [text is crossed out] offended her, [text is crossed out] I shouldn't
Page 2/4
2
"arrive." I have committed no offence, either by fact, act, or intention, [text is crossed out] ^& so I know I couldn't successfully pretend to be sorry -- for a thing which hasn't occurred.
You see, the whole trouble lies in the French character. It hasn't a shred of humor in it, consequently there is no depth to it: its compass, regulator, balance-wheel, is lacking. When you have hurt a Frenchman, you have hurt a child : you can't reason with him, you can only kiss him & pet him & flatter him.
If I ever run across Mme. B. I mean to tell her I was not intending to offend her. I don't imagine it will do any good ; but I couldn't say any more & make it sound sincere.
"arrive." I have committed no offence, either by fact, act, or intention, [text is crossed out] ^& so I know I couldn't successfully pretend to be sorry -- for a thing which hasn't occurred.
You see, the whole trouble lies in the French character. It hasn't a shred of humor in it, consequently there is no depth to it: its compass, regulator, balance-wheel, is lacking. When you have hurt a Frenchman, you have hurt a child : you can't reason with him, you can only kiss him & pet him & flatter him.
If I ever run across Mme. B. I mean to tell her I was not intending to offend her. I don't imagine it will do any good ; but I couldn't say any more & make it sound sincere.
Page 3/4
I expect to sail nine days hence & join the family in Paris the middle of the month. I suppose we shall then leave right away for Aix-les-Bains, where Livy will takes baths for the gout which is giving her so much pain in her fingers. When I left her the 6th of the present month she was making good progress toward the cure of her other ailments, & Susy was getting stronger and healthier daily.
Page 4/4
I send love to you & your sister, & add the hope that we may all foregather again one of these days.
Sincerely Yours
S L CLEMENS
